My Body Has the Answers

I attended the Jill Satterfield Mindfulness Meditation and Movement weekend on Saturday and Sunday. It was pretty fabulous. Lots of meditation, some yoga, which, though I really love long vinyassa sessions, I found that I loved. Even though it was wonderful and the time flew by, I found myself feeling lots of emotion at this workshop. I guess that's to be expected, but I was surprised at how powerful I found this emotion.

I did not do well in how I dealt with this emotion on Saturday when the workshop ended and it was time to go home. Well, at first I did okay. I came home, baked pumpkin bread and chillaxed. At 6:30 Liz stopped studying and we began talking about evening plans. We had planned on going on a date. I realized at that point that I was utterly exhausted. I chose to ignore that and we went out in a torrential downpour complete with strong winds to eat. I found myself fighting off a panick attack the whole way there. We left at 7:20 and didn't make it to the restaurant until 8. Hypoglycemia had set in. I kept snapping at Liz. The weather unnerved me. Driving in the weather unnerved me even more. And then I spent the rest of the evening apologizing--especially after I got some food and my blood sugar went back to normal.

On Sunday Jill reiterated something that really got me thinking. It was something to the tune of you have to do what's best for you, what feels right to you in order to be good to other people, or that's how I interpreted it anyway. This helped a lot. I left the workshop on Sunday and went home to have a snack and rest for a while before trying to tackle any chores. I asked Liz to go with me to the grocery store because I knew that I was too tired to really handle it well myself. Then I got home and put away all the groceries and made dinner and felt very rejuvenated after eating it, enough so that I cleaned up dinner and did other chores.

I checked in with myself and listened to myself and did what was best for me and it really did allow me to do what was best for my family. Liz was able to study a ton and I was patient and kind about it and I think all really felt good.