Monday, November 23, 2009

Mmm what [I] say? Mmm that [I] only meant well? Well of course [I] did.

I've had a pretty bad day today. I was completely exhausted this morning when I woke up, and just couldn't seem to wake up at work either. The afternoon was a little better than the morning, but not much. I had a pretty okay night after work. I came home and made dinner and went to acupuncture. Liz even drove me, and acupuncture was great. It felt so good. I left feeling very focused on the present moment. Then a little bit after getting home from acupuncture I decided to try to hem some new jeans I got. It was a mistake. I should not have tried to hem them. It was just the final straw on a bad day.

After a few stitches, I said something about how it was a mess. Now, I meant it was a figurative mess, but I guess Liz took it to be a literal mess because she said something about how if it was a mess then I shouldn't do it. It upset me so much! It was an hour ago that she said that and I'm still really upset, and obviously it wasn't just the jeans/hemming that got me upset. It was just the sum of the entire day. I don't think I would have felt this way while taking Zoloft. I am just so weepy right now. I swear I've cried more in the past two weeks than I have in the past two years.

I hate to say it, but it's getting really hard. I'm pretty sure Liz hates me now, and I don't know what to do. I'm very, very upset and exhausted. I keep getting upset at little things lately, but this is the biggest little thing I've gotten upset about since beginning to taper off Zoloft. I just don't know. I feel like it's really messing everything up.

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